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Thursday 8 April 2021

Last day of camp ::sadface::

 It goes so quick, too quick, this WitchCamp journey. Five days seems like a good amount of time but it's not. It's not because the work done in camp is the work of lifetimes and it's an ongoing process. It's just easier to do the work surrounded by a bunch of other humans doing the work too, being guided by amazing Sages who have and are still doing the work too, teaching you, encouraging you. The motivation ebbs as time marches on and #MuggleLife takes over once more. I can already hear my Lit Review stomping its metaphorical feet demanding attention like a two-year-old child. I come out of camp with the best of intentions to keep up the practice but it's never the same, it's never as intensive, it's never as much as what I'd truly like to do, which just makes me appreciate WitchCamp all the more. It's time I get to really dedicate to myself, my own personal growth, it is self-care in its own way and knowing that bettering myself ripples outward like water in a pond.

The last day of Path consisted mostly of wrapping things up in a neat enough little bow. We spoke of different ways to run the Iron, which was so useful and I'm grateful for it. It can be used as a divination tool, it can be used to check in with yourself about why you're feeling a certain emotion - you know, in those times where you are feeling flat or off or meh and you aren't sure why. So many different ways to use the Iron Pentacle and I'm looking forward to trying them. It is my intention to incorporate it into my daily routine before I get out of bed just super quickly run Iron and then go along with my day trusting that even that small thing will have a butterfly effect on my life. As with the last day of all Paths - well, I think so I mean I've only ever done two Paths so far and it's true for both of them - the participants of Path create their own little half-hour ritual in relation to the theme of the Path you were on. We get a half-hour to plan it and then a half-hour to execute it. Our Tech Goddess kind of took the reigns and I was more than happy for someone else with far more experience than I to lead the way and she did an amazing job. She found herself under a lot of time pressure just to get everything done. We all collaborated on the what but the Tech Goddess was in charge of the techie side like creating breakout rooms and organising the music for the ritual, which was essentially a dance party homage to the Iron Pentacle for our awesome teachers to enjoy.

So the group chose either a chant or a song for each point of the Iron Pentacle, the circle was cast and we danced to each song.

For the Sex Point, we had a chant created by (I'm not sure of the spelling) Susanne Stirling called Love is the Law but we changed Love to Sex. I'm unable to find an audio of it but the lyrics went:

All things come from sex

All things return to sex

Sex is the law, sex is the law, sex is the law

I see you, I know you, I am you.

We chanted that a few times through while we danced and then moved on to the Self Point. For Self we chose Madonna's Express Yourself.

Express Yourself

I was surprised by how well I still know all the lyrics!

From there we moved on to Passion with another chant, I'm not sure who wrote this one so cannot give credit but the lyrics went:

I am transforming, lead me to my passion

I am transforming, lead me to my passion

I choose life, YEAH! I choose Courage.

I choose life to dance amongst the stars.

Again, we chanted that a few times before moving on to Pride. Anastacia's Paid My Dues was chosen and we danced to that:

Paid my dues

Lastly, we came to Power and another chant was chosen. Full Height of Power by Kellianna:

Full Height of Power

That was going to be the end of the ritual and the ritual was going to finish there but magic took over and our Tech Goddess had technical difficulties of her own and we had at least two more songs run through before she fixed it, which was hilarious but I could see how frazzled she was. I think it was perfect though and I love how magic just happens no matter how much you plan or try to structure something, magic will have its way, magic will be heard. It was a great end to Path though.

I got to see some of my Affinity group before the closing ritual and that was awesome too. I found out that one of my Affinity peeps who was also a Tech Goddess had the same thing happen at the end of her Path too where her laptop froze her out. It's interesting and makes me wonder if any other Tech Goddesses who were leading something had that happen as well, almost like the powers that be were saying no! Don't stop! Don't end Path! Keep going! But alas, all great things must come to an end.

Normally when at in-person camp the last day is a day of clean up. At camp, each Affinity Group is assigned daily chores and on the last day are assigned two chores to help get the camp back to the same state it was before our arrival. There is something ritualistic about that act in and of itself. The pack down. The gather and packing of your stuff, the cleaning of the areas, people returning all their coffee cups and coming into the Ritual Hall to gather the items they offered to the altars or seeking lost property, people meeting and connecting with each other as they pass on their missions to say fare-the-well and to give and receive copious amounts of hugs. Obviously, that aspect of the wrapping up of camp wasn't there; however, I hadn't done any of my dishes for the whole time other than continually washing my favourite coffee cups so I packed my dishwasher and I took down my own altar and that felt like packing down, it was just missing the hugs.

The camp finished off with the closing ritual which mostly consisted of thanking all the campers who contributed in some way to the running of the camp, devoking the elements, thanking the allies and ancestors and then opening the circle back up again. We did have an intention, which was SHINING STARS DANCE IN LOVE. We also chanted We Are Stars by Suzanne Sterling. When it was all done there is one last process called the dialling down where you stop the swaying that tends to happen during camp like we are all rocking a baby and we have to keep our eyes open and focus on some mundane things like the toilet lid or your toothbrush, etc and we go down the chakra's and close them up like the closing of a camera's aperture or, for me, I imagine a dial from 1 to 10 and all my chakras are pretty much at 8-10 by the end of camp so I turn it way back down to 2-4 and then we imagine a column dropping into the earth to help ground us in the earth before we go off and live our Muggle lives once more.

It's a curious thing energy and feeling it, the difference in it. There was a very distinct difference once that was all done and I was looking on the screen. It felt like I was in a uni class looking at my peers as opposed to ... hmmm, I'm not sure I have adequate words to accurately describe it, it was like there was a softness to the world and I was walking through the very thinnest of mists as we were all travelling between the worlds, behind the thin veil for the duration of camp and by the end, that veil was removed and the mist dispersed. It was a whole different feeling.

Still, it felt strange to get into my car afterwards so I could go rescue my two youngest from their father. <-- that may sound strange but they do not like having to live with him and complain every Sunday they are with me and they have to go to their father's the next day for his week with them so it always feels like I am rescuing them, also because I know the covert damage that man does and I hear it in their stories and the words they use as they off-load their week's experience having to live with him. Plus, coming out of such a supportive and held space, I think I was feeling the need to rescue them from him even more.

So now camp is over for another year. If I had the money I would go to all of them across the globe but until I finish my degree and end up with a job that pays my true worth, I shall just beg and plead for scholarships to be able to attend my 'home' camp. It's home because the Mountain it is held on in person is a mere 20-minute drive from here. It feels strange and sad to be out of camp now and back in the Muggle world but it was good that I could see my kids straight away. They are my world.

No more camp talk now. Not sure what I will blog about moving forward but there will likely be more witchy stuff along the way and definitely arty stuff and most definitely art therapy stuff as I continue to traverse my last year of the bachelor degree. Thank you for reading about my journey. Until next time, in love and laughter, In Joy!









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